The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming

Movie: The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming (1966), Not Rated

Date Watched: October 24th, 2009

Star Your Parents May Know: Carl Reiner, Alan Arkin, Brian Keith (Uncle Bill from Family Affair), Theodore Bikel


Recommendations: 4 stars

Treats Served: My mom was mean enough to not serve us anything.

Summary: A Russian submarine lands accidentally off the coast of Gloucester Island, MA. All the Russian soldiers want is a boat to pull the submarine off the sand bar and leave peacefully. It was the time of the Cold War and the Russians were worried that they would start World War III. Instead of leaving quietly, the soldiers create disturbances on the tiny island.

Even though the Russians only meet a family and and old lady, rumors start spreading quickly and people become confused and panicked.

This funny (not hilarious) movie shows what happens if you spread rumors. It's almost like the game "telephone." You pass on a message and each next person usually mixes it up a little until it gets completely changed. The people of this island go crazy. An old guy who used to be in the Navy started an unorganized army. Others meet at a bar to discuss how to fight back, but they end up drinking instead. One drunk guy goes to get his horse to warn the town people that "The Russians Are Coming, The Russians Are Coming," except he couldn't catch his horse.

This wasn't a laugh out loud movie, but it was still funny because the people were all so stupid.

Watch the preview and you decide.

My Joke: Do you get beer at a sand bar?

Patchy's Comment: What a bunch of dorks.

Planet of the Apes AND Beneath Planet of the Apes

Movies: Planet of the Apes (1968), Rated G and Beneath the Planet of the Apes (1970), Rated G

Date Watched: October 3 and 18th, 2009

Star Your Parents May Know: Charlton Heston



Recommendations:
Planet of the Apes = 4 stars
Beneath the Planet of the Apes = 4 stars

Review:
Monkeys riding horses with guns? People in cages like animals? This the world that Astronaut Taylor crash lands on 2,000 year after he takes off from earth. Taylor finds the apes are in charge of the planet and humans are the animals. The apes speak English and the humans are mute. When Taylor yells, "Take your stinking paws off me, you damned dirty ape!," the apes are stunned. (Watch this scene.) The leaders want to kill the dangerous stranger. The scientists, who are chimpanzees, want to study him. Taylor needs to escape the apes and return to earth. He flees with Nova, the mate they gave him. They find the secret only a few apes know.

The story continues in Beneath the Planet of the Apes. A new astronaut, Brent, also crash lands on this planet in search of Astronaut Taylor. He also discovers Nova and that the apes rule. Brent escapes the apes and finds himself in another city underground. This city is ruled by evolved humans who speak into your brain. The apes and the evolved humans both want power. Brent, Taylor and Nova find themselves in the middle of it. As we know from the first movie, power leads to disaster.

I thought both movies were really good. These movies were rated G, but they should actually be PG because there is a lot of shooting people and blood. The main characters in both movies were very interesting. They were very dramatic and to me that made it more realistic. They were always strong and not too scared. The scenery and the apes looked really fake, which made it weird and like the old-fashioned movies, which they are.

I think I'm going to watch the other sequels even though they don't sound too great, but you can watch the trailers and decide.

• Planet of the Apes Trailer
• Beneath the Planet of the Apes: Trailer and watch the whole movie from your computer

Patchy's Comments: He doesn't brush his teeth (referring to Charlton Heston). Re: First movie: This is kind of like the first one.